“and I have become comfortably numb,” is what Pink Floyd song says in what I consider to be one of the most depressing songs of all time. When I look back at when I started using drugs, it was because I enjoyed feeling comfortably numb. It was better than the anxiety and depression and self-defeating…… Continue reading Numb / Detox / Relapse / Recycle ?
I’ll start this post by saying I broke my sobriety the other day and although it was a great time with friends, and though I felt fine the following day, I knew I was going down a slippery slope. The truth is, it’s either all or nothing for me, and right now I’m choosing nothing.…… Continue reading Sobriety During the Holidays: Impossible?
Ugh. Just ugh. Here’s a piece that has been in my mind, pricking it my brain, for days now. It’s about why getting healthy, mentally and physically, actually sucks. It’s about why I actually hate personal growth. Eff this. It’s so hard, sometimes it feels too hard. And I feel both brave and hopeless and…… Continue reading Why Getting Healthy Actually Sucks
Some of you may know that I quit smoking pot in Spring 2020. The first two weeks felt impossible, the first month was better, and by the second and third months I was feeling better and being more productive than I had for the past few years combined. Then, literally two days ago, after celebrating…… Continue reading 5 Things I Learned During My Relapse